A Tawdry Time

In the post-traumatic “Men are Pigs & Women are Just Nasty when there hairy & the World is a filthy place without Wet-Wipes” syndrome, in comes the holiday season like an ill placed hand grenade too ones own ass. I find the holiday season to be Happy, Sad, Depressing, Uplifting, Spiritual and at times tawdry. “Tawdry” I like that word I don’t get the opportunity to use is much, it’s even fun to say. Go ahead do it with me “TAH-DREE”, fun wasn’t it? I believe that what ever one may feel during the holiday season we can all come to a strong axiom that it’s just exceptionally fucking tawdry time of year even if you’re pooping jingle bells. My brother actually pooped a jingle bell once in the winter of 71’ three days before Christmas. My mother actually ended up stitching the bell back on to my oldest sisters stocking that hung over the mantel in which he had gotten it from, even at the age of 4 I found this disturbing. In 1971 my two siblings and myself got coal in our stockings that Christmas, not because we where naughty, but simply because my mother forgot to get some candy snacks to fill the stockings. Where the hell she ever found the coal was beyond me, perhaps they where charcoal brickets for barbequing, either way it was a tawdry event. In 1975 my youngest sister was born, that was the first Christmas I got drunk on eggnog and the first time I found away to relieve myself of tawdry details. My Christmas of 1978 was pretty cool it was the first year and only year that I got a cartoon of non-filtered Camels gift wrapped under the tree. My name ended up on the cigarettes by accident, but that did not keep me from smoking a few camels and dipping into the eggnog again that year. I find this blog becoming a tad tawdry to write, but you get the idea. I avoid tawdry holidays now by not wishing I had the powers of an angel but simply being contently cozy in the presence of them.
Tawdry origin: 1605–15; short for (Saint) Audrey lace, i.e., neck lace bought at St. Audrey's Fair in Ely, England; so called after St. Audrey (OE Aethelthry d. 679), Northumbrian queen and patron saint of Ely, who, according to tradition, died of a throat tumor which she considered just punishment of her youthful liking for neck laces̄th,